Just thought I’d throw this out there…..
As I was playing around today, something occurred to me: we missed a good opportunity last time the city flooded. See, the water filled the city to sea level in a lot of places. It only took about 24 hours to happen. What we should have done; or maybe we can do it later this year, is when the city is all flooded we just need to dump about a million bags of Quickcrete on the city. And just like that, there’s no more need to talk about raising houses and rebuilding. We’re that much closer to sea level and everyone starts off with a clean slate so to speak. Now, sure, there will be some second stories rising above the new concrete landscape - well, you’re in luck - now you own a ranch house. All you’d have to do is paint some lines here and there and you’ve got instant roads, a few signs and some parking meters, etc. Plus because water is the ultimate leveler, there’s no need to worry about making it blend in with the rest of the still-dry city naturally.
Then in a few more years, or next year even, when the city floods again, this time filling up to the top of the levees: rinse and repeat. More Quickcrete to the rescue and just like that, we’re an elevated city, 20ft above sea level in just two iterations and all our fears about flooding will vanish. We can build some stairs and handicap ramps up from outside the city so people can get up there. And just think about the amazing view of the surrounding areas. All those petroleum processing plants lit up like big ol’ shopping malls of death. And we can stand at the rails of our big Quickcrete monolith, gazing out at the toxic smoke plumes, holding each other close, secure in the knowledge that we’re never going to see a fucking dime.
Related posts:
I’ve always thought we should just fill up lake pontchartrain with quikcrete, that would help prevent these little flooding snafus as well.
Of course, the weight of the concrete would just sink the city, so we’d be back to where we started, except for a more sturdy foundation, so to speak….
And how would you stop all those kids writing their names in the concrete? :)
Yeah, mais chez, we can hav’ basements then, son!
I will sorely miss the grass, and gators,
and flowers, sniff - I miss them already.
Laurie
…..ouch.
Update: The puppy can now bark and howl and
whine and moan and does it very effectively.
Methinks it’s almost asleep, I think.
It’s probably wide awake and waiting for me me to start dreaming.
“Awooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”!!!
Ive endorsed turning the entire world into a slab of concrete for years. Im glad to see someone else who shares part of my vision. Thank you.
that was fucking brilliant.