baby, baby
A month or so ago I noted that a friend of mine was moving here, much to the shock and horror of her friends and family. She got to town about two weeks ago and has had a fairly easy time so far, aside from the routine inconveniences of places having weird hours and long lines. She got a waitressing job at the second place she walked into, and she starts classes at Delgado next week.
So, today she asks me this question; “Is it normal to call your waitress ‘baby’ here?”
Ahh, the pleasures of explaining our cultural nuances to new residents. How does one tell a yankee that ‘baby’ is not usually a term of affection here? I guess you could say just that. But instead I says to her “Well, waitresses call me ‘baby’ all the time.”
“Well, that’s because they’re flirting with you,” she says.
“No, no, you don’t understand. The ladies down at City Hall call me ‘baby’ too, and trust me, they ain’t flirting.”
“Huh?”
Such culture shock. I admit, it’s a little off-putting at first. The first time it happened to me was many years ago at Shoney’s on the Westbank. The (Vietnamese) waitress said “Here’s your sweet tea, BABY!” in a thick Vietnamese accent. My politically incorrect mind was instantly reminded of the “love you long time” scene in Full Metal Jacket. Was my waitress propositioning me at the table? How was I to respond? After moving here a few years later I realized that she was not a freakish hooker at all, but was merely using the local parlance. How embarrassing for me.
But ‘baby’ is not limited to restaurants. Let’s just put it this way; garbage men call each other ‘baby’ here. Construction workers too, probably. At work I can call the secretary ‘baby’ and not get sued for sexual harassment. It’s just one of those charming, informal displays of friendliness that would garner angry stares from most people in other parts of the country.
But this conversation made me think. I don’t think people are saying ‘baby’ enough these days. By my best estimates, ‘baby’ usage is down at least 54% since Katrina. I think this follows a general trend of declining civility and cordiality around town. I think it’s time to turn this frown upside-down. So I want everyone who reads this to say ‘baby’ to the next person they see. We need to retain our charm and our warm demeanor. It’s really one of the only things we’ve got going for us.
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Baby is pretty common across the South. New Orleans, however, might be the only city where men call each other baby. I love that!
Having moved back after myself, I’d love to hear what people’s reaction to her coming is. My wife (who gets out more than I do since I work from home) routinely gets that look usually reserved for people who wear tin foil under their caps, then a big Thank You For Coming.
I was thinking about this “baby” thing a couple weeks back when I was down South, and by that I mean when I visited Chicago. The first time that I went to the Weiners Circle, I discovered that a few baby-babies would get me a long way. Not only was I charged less for my dog, but I actually was treated quite cordially and nicely, treatment that my baby-free vernaculared friend did not receive. Returning back to Wisconsin, I tried it a little more. Actually, I called everyone “baby” for a few days, but the novelty wore off quickly as it seemed that instead of buttering people up, it just offended them, and I hate unintentionally offending people.
“If I exercise my devils well my angels may leave too…when they leave their so hard to find. So please call me, baby…”
Yes, hon’, pecan, doll, luv’, O li’l girl,
papoose, elle, fille, petite, perky, hey slowpoke, ‘yo, yeah you,
witch, pheweeeeee, pip squeak, piquaint, piston,
poteau, cher, chez, cheri, sugar, …………
Laurie
I’m glad to hear that your friend’s transition into New Orleans has gone relatively well. I think that after watching many of our friends and acquaintances leaving our fair city, it is nice to hear of other people moving here. I’ve always like the use of the word baby around these parts. I also love it when I get called “my love”. I am originally from Guatemala, where terms of endearment are very common, so it is nice to hear them here.
yeah you right about that, baby!
you’re right. usage is down. i haven’t been called baby once, and i’ve been back for 2 and a half months.
Joe….hey baby
Maintnent cher…?
laurie
This is sweet!…hey baby yourself! What’s shakin’??
When I lived in Houston several years back, I worked with this guy, Vinny, who was from New Orleans and he always used the phrase “hey baby” until I finally flipped out on him and told him to “stop calling me &!@!-ing baby!!!” to which he replied, “Sorry, baby.” Fast forward almost ten years later and I totally get it now.
Or how when you see someone walking down the street and you wave hello and they say “alright.”
When did this “baby” stuff start? Seems to me it use to be either, “hon” or “dahlin”. At least it was when I was growing up in N.O. In fact I ordered a King Cake from Haydel’s about 5 or 6 years ago, calling form Hawaii, and the lady kept saying, “Dahlin” this and “Dahlin” that. It made be home sick.
actually, i was at the premiere for little miss sunshine tonight and i got a babe. it’ll do. thanks termite. you’re great, baby.
yes Joe she certainly is. Welcome home ‘baby-girl’, welcome home.
I never liked baby. I always use “hon,” “sugar,” “dahlin,” or “cap.”