For those of you who do not know, I am pregnant. Currently I am moving into the part of the pregnancy where on top of everything else I am supposed to start worrying about Pediatricians and Childcare (have I not already been worrying about this?). So, the search begins.

Of course being in New Orleans after Katrina provides a few extra challenges. First, most of the childcare centers in New Orleans are gone and according to this article, they are not really planning to come back.

It’s no secret that New Orleans had trouble with its schools in the past and the prospect of putting my children through school here is a scary one at best but the more pressing question for me is what about the day care centers, what were they like pre Katrina and with only 52 of 266 child care centers left in the city what are they like now? Let’s now sprinkle on the fact that I will need infant care and all of a sudden, the search becomes nearly impossible. The one plus is I will only need this care two to three days per week.
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As Heather has mentioned, The President is indeed coming for a visit next week. And if this visit is like those in the past, we can all be assured of swift resolution of the few challenges still remaining in our rapidly recovering region. I can hear the streetcars running down St. Charles already — and by year’s end, I predict a thousand people a day will be moving back into their refurbished homes and gleefully lining up to register their children in our top-tier schools.

But seriously….
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It has been confirmed that Bush is indeed coming back to town next week. Great. I wonder which mansion on St. Charles he will look at to determine that the rebuilding effort is coming along well.
How come the City welcome wagon doesn’t show him what’s really up? I say we take his ass out to the lower 9th ward at 11pm and let him walk back to town.

My NO Metroblog silence of late is due to a decision I want to make and soon – should my blog voice become louder and more urgent? It’s not business as usual in NOLA, but we’ve lapsed back to our old ways, merely content to be here and go about our daily work. As I said to Chelsea Merz of Open Source Radio last evening, “Those returning to New Orleans must realize that their work here will have to be quadrupled, or quintupled, to bring the city back to to what it was before and move beyond. Each one of us has to attend to our own job, friends/neighbors and their needs and civic duties such as cleanup, writing and engaging in dialogue with the government and those outside New Orleans. And please don’t make work for other people.”

Our city can only handle so much right now. We didn’t and don’t have the moentary and human resources to fix every pothole and busted main and even to pick up mountains of trash piling up in MidCity, Gentilly and other neighborhoods struggling by a thread to survive.

Walking home last night, I watched a man and a woman run from Mojo Cafe to the Magazine St. bus. My delight at more people taking local public transportation was broken by the sight of the woman toss a go-cup into the bushes by the bus stop. Angered, I yelled, “Hey, did you just throw garbage on the street when a trash can is available at Mojo?” The couple turned, gave me a blank stare and continued on their way. Picking up the cup myself, I stewed for a long while after at this lack of civility and how can New Orleans survive when our own don’t respect it?
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A year later, and clearly, no one is satisfied. Residents are unhappy with the mayor, the feds, and to a lesser degree, the governor. Whites are unhappy with blacks, blacks are unhappy with whites, and no one is happy with the Hispanics except the contractors, who are unhappy with everyone who inhabits the Most Offensive Architectural Eyesore This Side of the Pecos (aka City Hall). Spike Lee is unhappy with the Times-Picayune. And those stinky hippies over at Common Ground…. Well, they’re just unhappy. Not enough hacky-sack, I suppose.

Of course, all this sadness and tsoris could be mitigated with a good plan and some good communications skills. Unfortunately, our city leadership fails so miserably on both counts that the infamous Hundred Day Plan cooked up by C. Ray Nagin (the “c” stands for “cueball”!) can’t even be found on the aptly named City of NO.com. Maybe he’ll get around to that in the next 365 days.

Now, someone has to cobble together a set of goals for the city, and given my current summer coiffure, I suppose I’m as qualified to do so as hizzoner or anyone else. I have therefore set out a five-point plan containing reasonable, achievable objectives, which will yield quantifiable results. They may not make everybody happy, but other than Laura Bush and Cicciolina [nsfw!], who really gives a crap about that?

1. Start demolishing buildings already. As a benevolent autocrat, I understand that some residents can’t afford to gut or renovate their homes, and provisions will be made for such folks. However, the people who own Robert’s on Elysian Fields, the Ford dealership on Carrollton, and dozens of fast food restaurants across the city…. Well, let’s just say those Taco Bells are ruining my view. And I’m a man who likes a good view.

2. Retrofit all structures with solar power. Perhaps it seems uncharacteristically hippie-ish of me, but this part of the plan is important because (a) it’ll diminish the very greenhouse gasses that heat up the planet that create the monster hurricanes that destroy coastal and near-coastal cities like ours; (b) with solar power, we won’t have to worry about losing power during afternoon thunderstorms; and (c) there’s no better way to encourage Entergy to go fuck themselves.

3. Prohibit predictable stories by the press. If I speak to one more reporter who says, “Yes, I understand that you’re trying to get back to normal, but don’t you find it depressing down there?”, I cannot be held responsible for my actions. Under my plan, there will be a residency requirement for all members of the press: no one will be permitted write a word about the city without having lived in Orleans Parish for at least a year. After-dinner forays to Creole Creamery will be highly encouraged by not required. Norman Robinson and Alec Gifford will have their press passes permanently revoked.

4. Accept no more checks. New Orleanians have wasted far too much time in the past year. We waited for the storm to pass, waited for news of the city’s fate, waited for rescue, waited for floodwaters to be pumped out, waited for the president to pay us a visit, waited to be allowed to come home. We don’t need to spend more time hanging around, stuck in line behind soccer moms who can’t be bothered to call in and activate their debit cards.

5. Enforce new-skool sharia law. I’m not talking about traditional sharia law, which would reduce the population of New Orleans to 13 or so within a few weeks. No, I’m talking about a new sharia, one to fit our city at this curious point in its history. For example, under my plan, if a city council member is caught taking bribes, the contents of her checking account will be given to an AIDS hospice in her district. A federal official found to be holding up disbursements of grant funds will be wrapped in duct tape and dragged through the streets behind a French Quarter donkey cart. The stupid, the stubborn, and those lacking common sense will be jailed and shipped to Alabama, where they may ultimately feel more at home. And if, perhaps, a group of people holds up an entire bar at gunpoint, they’ll be shot on sight, drawn, quartered, and served in a variety of piquante tapas dishes.

On Sunday I headed down to the CAC to check out the Katrina exhibit. I found the video documentaries insightful and the photographs amazing. There is also an elaborate architecture exhibit that was interesting but way over my scope of understanding. That being said, I was mildly disappointed. Let me preface that I have absolutely no knowledge or experience in what it takes to get a viable exhibit running but my impression was the CAC’s exhibit was small– too small for such an enormous event. And the number and range of photographs we minor in comparison to NOMA’s exhibit. And with all that empty space…

The potential for greatness in expression is lacking from this exhibit. Where are all the artists? Where are the exhibits that question popular notions of art? I expected to find an MRE in one corner huddled next to kernels of cat food and a half-empty Kentwood 12 ounce bottle of water. Or sheetrock that has been sealed and framed (because let’s face it– it may have smelled awful but the patterns and colors were breathtaking.)

Or was all that empty space the exhibit itself?

I wrote this a couple weeks back.

It’s Number 2 of my personal love letters to New Orleans.

Hope you enjoy.

My love,

You know a day like today is one of my favorites. The rain came from above and got you a little wet. You know I love you even more when the rains come. For what reason I do not know, but I have always loved the way you feel during and after a rain.

Even in your devastated state, you glisten when the raindrops touch your slate roofs in the French Quarter. You shine as the water hits your oaks, drops hanging on leaves for dear life, they just don’t want to leave the beauty of the nature you share with me, with us.
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So, I lifted this picture off of nola.com, it goes with this story. The story is about some car chase that ended up with this NOPD car getting totalled, but I would like to use this picture to call attention to the graphics on the side of the police car. All of the new NOPD vehicles are getting this design on them, surely you’ve seen one by now. I’ve been trying to get a better picture of one for months, but I’m always afraid of getting beaten down by cops for doing so, so this picture will have to suffice.

To put it bluntly, it is a weak design. These cop cars look like they belong in Providence, RI or some other milquetoast place whose criminal element is limited to pets escaping from backyards and kids shoplifting candy bars. They have this vaguely futuristic look, reminiscent of the cop cars from the film “Robocop.” No wonder crime is out of control here. Our police look like a bunch of dandies driving around in these silly things. Might as well replace their guns with super soakers while you’re at it. I really preferred the old, old design of a simple crescent and star and nothing else. That meant business. But obviously the department is trying to look progressive and 21st century and what not, so that isn’t going to work. So here is what I think should be placed on the sides of all new NOPD vehicles:
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I spent my weekend in Missippi and the weekend before that in ‘Bama and it truly makes me appreciate the food we have here in NOLA. However, they have us beat in one culinary department: the gratuitous usage of hushpuppies with all meals. Listen y’all, deep fried cornmeal is good. I don’t see it happening too much here in town, which is strange because most history books will attribute their roots to the Ursuline nuns of Nouvelle Orleans. I think it is high time we asked our local chefs to bring this tasty treat back.

Recently I began Geocaching and it has turned into a fun and learning experience for me. I first learned about Geocaching almost a year ago when some friends from Orlando suggested I give it a try but I was not sure I had the time to get out and do it right them, plus my Husband was not at all interested in the idea.
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