Places Mayor C. Ray Nagin may be hiding
- In Chicago, writing speeches for Obama’s erstwhile pastor.
- In Cuba, because he needs his annual physical and his local doctor can’t see him for another six months.
- At Chris Rose’s house, because that’s where the crazies live.
- At the Broadway South offices, because he’s sure to run into absolutely no one.
- At Home Depot, because he’s gotta make sure his sons do the [questionably legitimate] job right.
- In a squad car, because real police officers surely wouldn’t make blunders like that.
- Resting upon the fragrant bosom of a hooker/actress/songwriter.
- Pinned beneath a burning 1979 Ford Pinto on top of an abandoned petroleum tank hundreds of miles from where anyone can hear him scream (or 300 yards from the nearest fire hydrant).