…by the US Postal Service did it take for this to wind up in our mailbox this morning?

The envelope is from an inmate at a California state prison and is addressed to (sic):

Mr. John A. Clarke
Executive Office/Clerk of the Administratively Unified Courts
North Valley District
XXX XXXXXX Street
San Fernando, Calif. 91340

I have Xed out the street address so weirdos won’t wind up at my door. But the street address is the ONLY thing that was correct about this winding up at my house. HTF did this wind up in New Orleans when all the ZIP codes are correct?

I know, I know. But this might explain why my (already paid-for) copies of Smithsonian Magazine have stopped arriving. Perhaps they’re going to a courthouse in San Fernando, Calif.

I also get mail for a farm co-op that has never been at this address. And, once a month or so, I get what appears to be an investment account statement for this same street address IN NEW YORK FREAKING CITY. This is can understand, since a 1 and a 7 can look alike to some machines. But damn.

I’ll just toss this one back in the mailbox with the others. But has anyone else noticed the increasing scarcity of mailboxes around town? There used to be one on Magazine in front of Mayan Import (the cigar place), but it’s been shut down. There are virtually no mailboxes anymore in the Lower Garden District, meaning we have to take outgoing mail up to Louisiana Ave. or drop it off if we happen to be downtown.

Ain’t right, I tell ya.

So there’s lots to do today in addition to the Saints Game. . . there is Festivus which is in its 5th year at 700 Magazine St. from Noon to 4pm today and for the next two Sundays. If you can’t make it you can still participate in the Airing of Grievances online and get that out of your system. I know I still have shopping to do and this is a good place to find interesting loot.

Then there is the Benefit for Bob Strong over on Robert St. and Prytania at La Crepe Nanou from 3 til 8pm where I will slinging hash with my Crepe Nanou apron on from 4-6pm. Come by and say hello. Felix’s has televisions in case you are having a priority conflict.

I am trying to fit some sleeping in tonight after working late at the bibliotheque. As Dangerblond mentioned, it’s exam season so I am on the late shift after a very early start to the day. Burning it at both ends. Best of luck to Danger on her last batch of exams before bustin her way out of law school ! The weather has been so pleasant, it’s prime for making the circuit of all things happening around town, however, particularly hard to stick to the books. Go Danger!

” Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime. Teach a man to create an artificial shortage of fish and he will eat steak.” -Jay Leno

When I first read this story I thought, ‘That seems like an odd priority’. So my mind instantly started coming up with marketing suggestions like…

“New Orleans: We’re not as fucked as you might think”

“Come to New Orleans: We’re only averaging 1 homicide every other day”

“Visit New Orleans: Most of our poor black people probably live in your town”

“New Orleans: We ain’t done shit yet”
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One who asks a question is a fool for five minutes; one who does not ask a question remains a fool forever.

My five minutes start now….

I spent the weekend doing a lot of manual labor, which gave me time to think. So I was thinking about what the most important questions facing the city are right now. More importantly, how close are we to an answer to these questions? And then, when we have an answer, are we willing to accept the implications of it? So here’s what I’ve come up with (in no particular order). Please add your own in the comments portion. It’s a hell of a lot longer than I intended, but it felt good to vent. I started to not publish this and just delete it. Guess we’ll see if I chose wisely.
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A tiny little script removed me from the MetroBlogging Author’s list once I hadn’t posted anything for 30 days. I knew it would so it didn’t take me by surprise or anything. What is interesting though, is the idea that someone made a decision and set something in motion. Then, without further action, all these other things “just sort of happen” when certain conditions are met. Just keep that in mind as you read on.
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No, this is not a headline from war torn Iraq. This is from the not so front pages of the Times Picayune. Close your eyes and picture you are in the Arizona desert with Will Smith. Now repeat after me. “Wicky……. Wicky Wow Wow …….. Wahl Wahl West. Muthah Fuckin Wahl Wahl West.” Do yah get it? Really great fun isn’t it? Let’s look at a simple equation and try to figure it out. There are 188,000 people in the wonderful City of New Orleans. We all know that is complete bullshit, but for the Mayor’s sake, let’s say that’s the number. If Juju-Bee shoots 4-Track, and Cash Crop retaliates and kills Juju-Bee, how many times can Pop n’ Fresh shoot Mop and Glo and all of his crew before everyone with a fake name is dead and we can all get some sleep?
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Prior to the Federal Flood, New Orleans was the most violent city in the poorest state in the civilized world. Today, with only half of our population back and a large portion of the African-American population as yet displaced or not returning, the crime and poverty stats are not exact, but Louisiana is the poorest in health and New Orleans the highest in unemployment and most impoverished, with a “crime strategy second to none in this city.” (In my opinion, it also has the largest poltergeist population - ask me later about the bottle of recently-purchased amchur that’s missing from my pantry.)

From the absurdly morbid to the morbidly absurd …

The future of New Orleans - its children and their education - is no laughing matter, however. With a combination of poor leadership (don’t even get me started on the Gang of Four), underpaid and underequipped teachers, absent parents, political contracts and citizen apathy, we failed the children of the New Orleans Public Schools up until August 29th of last year. Left Behind, the much-touted documentary which tells this tale, premiered at the Landmark Theatre in Canal Place last night (with possibly the longest line for popcorn in the history of that building). The movie lived up to my expectations so much that I hope it airs on PBS and HBO. Vincent Morelli, Jason Berry and their team of moviemakers and three John McDonough High School students - Mario, Jonathan and Joshua - give us one hour of research, interviews, timelines and on-site footage of what we always knew but still shocks us into submission: A large majority of the New Orleans Public Schools were a travesty of education, and the products of that system were a powder keg waiting to explode given the right circumstances. That time and opportunity arrived in the days of the Flood, when the world saw New Orleans break down.

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It looks like we should be paying a lot of attention to City Planning again. Remember the wailing and gnashing of teeth that was the last “democratic process” that kicked off the UNOP/CSO/GNOF/LRA/[insert acronym here] fest of City Planning? You can do it again! In about an hour, the tug of war between the Lambert plan and the Unified New Orleans plan resumes. Think New Orleans has the details. I like the lead-up: “Two recovery planning processes. One pot of federal funds. Today at 10:00 AM they meet at City Council Chambers for the Recovery Planning Smackdown. Get a load of their pre-bout trash talk.”

Bring out the mud and Crisco … again. My deja vu is having deja vu.

Also, what in the name of all that is bureaucratically unholy is the Inspector General position? So we can fight some more over who gets into that position?

Some have argued that under the current plan, the inspector general would be too weak, because the watchdog would have no subpoena power. Others are debating whether the inspector general should be a New Orleans insider or an outsider.

And why does Common Good care about New Orleans now? We’re missing the forest for the trees: watchdogs are required only when something is happening. So many positions and NO results. The City of NO, indeed.

While New Orleans turns into a laboratory for all of these do-gooders to experiment within, the broth is spoiling, folks. Prepare for our dirty laundry to go national. We, the residents of New Orleans, don’t have a say on how our city is rebuilt … but America will!

Today I spent the entire day in the City Council chambers listening to the Lambert planning presentations. Having spent that last 8 months attending a grueling number of hours of my ‘free’ time attending meetings in every neighborhood after having been in these same neighborhoods in January doing the population estimate, I realized how much I have learned about all the various neighborhoods in our city. I went with the idea that I would go for a couple of hours and see how much I could stand. I am as burned out on the process as most people. I have also attended a couple meetings with the new Unified Planning teams, starting the whole process over again. One reason I wanted to go was to determine if this whole other level of planning is necessary. Some neighborhoods would benefit from having more details added to their portion of the plan, like the 7th ward. They need help. The Tulane/Gravier plan, a critical area in District 4, is not quite complete. But residents here have done enough work to complete the formal presentation with Lambert in the next couple of weeks and have a plan consistent with the rest of District 4.
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Three Sundays ago I was eating lunch at Middendorf’s up in Manchac. I think I had the combination thin catfish and fried oyster dish. Anyway, seated two tables from us was a guy who’s been dubbed “superfan” on account of the Saints jersey he was wearing, along with the words “WHO” and “DAT” that were shaved into his face.

You don’t believe me, do you?
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