I’m the Conspirer!

2540488120.jpgI was a child in the early eighties. I remember walking to Time Saver down the street with two dollars I had scraped up from around the house. I would make that two dollars last the whole day. I could play a dollars worth of Dragon’s Lair or Defender, and still have a dollar left over for a pack of Big League Chew and a Coke. I went to one of the flagship convenience/gas stations today; let’s call it Exxon on the Run. I spent $68 in less than three minutes. Yes, I spent about one quarter of my paycheck at a convenience store for a pack of cigarettes, 23 gallons of gas and a Coke Zero. Even in the late eighties and early nineties I would not spend more than $15 to $20 at a gas station and would still have money left over to pay for a night out at Decatur House downtown or Charities’ in Metairie. So how, in the span of only 15 years, has the price of living tripled in this country?

I have been watching the Discovery channel lately, and they are showing magnificent breakthrough technology in the fuel industry. They have cars that run on corn oil, sugar cane, Hydrogen, and even water. Why the hell are we not jumping on this shit like white on rice? Why can’t one really rich fucking dude stand up and say “I have a shit load of cash, I’m going to build cars that run on water to sell to the general public.” Where is that guy? So what if they are more expensive to build. If I could hook up my garden hose to my car and have it run for a week, I’ll pay the extra money up front for the car.

I saw the Al Gore movie today, ‘An Inconvenient Truth”. To sum it up, we are complete assholes. We consume more fuel and produce more toxins into the air than any other major country combined. What’s up with that shit? You here the governments say we have the clean air act and that we are losing ground economically to Europe and China. Well, do something about it douche bags! If the struggling U.S. auto industry came up with a kick ass car that ran on water, they would sell out before they could make them.
Then they could sell them overseas and we would have another industry that would take the world by storm. All we export now is corn and bootleg copies of Talladega Nights.
I’ve read articles about government regulations this and that. Who is the government to say I can’t open a Hydrogen Station next to the Shell at Lee’s Circle? Fuck them. I don’t have a dime to my name, but somebody with money can do this. Who’s the piss wad who just won like 80 gazillion dollars in the lottery? Take some of that shit and give it to an engineer who can design and mass produce water cars. No, people with a shit load of money want to buy gold plated lamps and $1000 pairs of shoes. They are fucking retarded. If I had 50 million dollars, I would at least try to do something like that. What the fuck am I going to do with 50 million dollars? After you travel the world for a year and buy a big ass house, you still have 48 million left over. Do something productive with it fuck head.

The dicks in Washington will tell you that becoming completely free of oil would put thousand of people out of work. So what happened to the candle maker when Edison invented the light bulb? What happened to the buggy driver when Ford’s Model T hit the streets? What happened to the VCR repairman when DVD’s came out? They evolved and adapted is what they did. “Oh well, we can’t stop usin oil cuz bubba on the rig out there would be out of a job.” BULLSHIT! They don’t care who gets laid off, I think everyone here knows our government doesn’t give a rat’s ass about people. They do give a rat’s ass whether Johnny Chevron or Billy Citgo can still afford to buy their fourth Rolls Royce.

I don’t get it. How can something so blatantly easy be so difficult to achieve due to this government? It’s right there in front of them yet they decide to do nothing. Fuck them.
Why wouldn’t they talk to alternative fuel companies or solar companies and use the help of those companies to make this fucked up dump of a city a testing ground for new ideas? They have a clean slate for Christ’s sake. They could have solar cells put in all over the city. They could put those big fuck off windmills out in the gulf instead of oil rigs. It gets pretty windy out there. Why doesn’t Blanco put windmills in the gulf, but only in Louisiana waters so she can then tell King George to shove his royalties up his ass sideways. We could all go to Entergy headquarters and take a huge steaming dump on the front porch. “This is what you gave us so we are returning the favor.”

So that’s it. I’m done for now. I’m going to trade in my SUV tomorrow for a steam engine; only because that is all I can do for now. The drag ass bureaucracy of our state and federal governments make everything into a wait and see situation. Maybe Bill Gates will get some balls and make a water car. Then he could have two monopolies. Why not?

Can someone forward this to Blanco’s office?
Can someone forward this to Nagin’s office?
Can someone give them both an IQ test?

Peace out suckas


“The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”
-Winston Churchill

7 Comments so far

  1. atlkortez (unregistered) on March 17th, 2007 @ 9:52 pm

    Fantastic blog. It’s great to see people making relevant arguments today. Thanks so much. The people at atlanta metblogs realize how much of a good thing you guys are. I’m going to send as many people as I can to this blog. Get people thinking. And by the way. Thanks for the memory. I used to walk down to the Time Saver too. I’m a native of New Orleans. Best Bank baby.

  2. BravoBilly (unregistered) on March 17th, 2007 @ 10:06 pm

    Fantastic blog. I am a graduate of Benjamin Franklin, when it was over on Carrolton. You know all the Geeks. I first hit New Orleans and lived below Magazine Street on Napolean Ave and went Wright Jr. High back before 1959. The first question I got asked was, “What are you Cat or Frat?” I did not have clue what they were talking about. But they are still asking me the same questions in different places. The idea being, if you don’t dress like me, you don’t fit in…What we have done to our kids these days…You tell it, about the government.

  3. Stacy (unregistered) on March 18th, 2007 @ 12:02 pm

    **stands and applauds and kisses your feet**

  4. Laurie (unregistered) on March 18th, 2007 @ 12:56 pm

    Yeah, you right! Great post! Don’t lose this anger – it’s what we all need to have in order to effect true change. I can’t wait to take a dump on the Entergy front porch with you!

  5. jenn cal (unregistered) on March 18th, 2007 @ 10:27 pm

    Here is the sad truth, several years ago Saturn released a 100% electric car that you could actually drive at highway speeds for up to 250 miles without recharging. An entire infrastructure was set up in California to accomodate these vehicles. These were leased, but no one was allowed to purchase the vehicle at the end. At the end of the lease term these vehicles were rounded up and sent off to be crushed at the junkyard. Want to be pissed off and informed rent the documentary “Who killed the electric car?” It’s a real eye opener. Sometimes it seems like we live in a business not a country, and we are all just mailroom clerks.

  6. BravoBilly (unregistered) on March 23rd, 2007 @ 10:28 pm

    THIS IN RESPONSE TO YOUR BLOG POSTED ON ANOTHER SITE: AT: http://forum.patzpc.com Under Just Chillin

    The problem with this government is simple. It is run by human beings. For those of you that don’t know, human beings are selfish and greedy. We’re all born that way, and some of us (a small minority) are raised not to be, but take any three year old and see if he/she will share his/her toys. I don’t think so. How does this translate into problems in the government? Simple. In Washington DC, there is a group of people called lobbyists. These people (assholes, really) work for various companies and rich fuck heads to ensure that laws are passed which are favorable to them. In other words, the bribe politicians to vote their way. This translates to big business runs America. Secondly, we don’t need water cars or cars that run on ethanol. Check with the US patent office and you can find that there are patents for gasoline engines with fuel economies over 100MPG. Why are these not on the road? The patents were bought by the oil companies. Anyone who decides to manufacture these engines gets sued and goes to prison. Isn’t this a great country? Because if I decide to make progress and some rich asshole doesn’t like it, I go to prison. How depressing? The bottom line is that while we have the illusion of democracy (our votes don’t really count, it’s the electoral college that makes the decisions), the truth is that the top 5% of the population that control 95% of the money (economy) make all the decisions. Quite frankly, they don’t give a rat’s ass what happens to the rest of the 95% of the population that can’t afford to go to sleep at night because the cost of living today requires people to work three full time jobs.

    Fuck it. I’m gonna hack of my leg (my knee is killing me anyway), claim disability, and move to Mexico. I hear there are no Mexicans there anyway, they all crossed the border and work here illegally.

  7. J.D. (unregistered) on April 4th, 2007 @ 7:15 pm

    Excellent post, but reminds me of a story I heard recently…and sorry about not having exact dates and details, but wasn’t taking notes. At one time, Ford was going to buy Ferarri. At the last minute, Ferarri backed out of the deal. Suits at Ford were royally pissed, and told Ford engineering to develop a car that would leave Ferarris in the dust in various races. Ford developed the Ford GT (re-released recently), and it pretty well smoked Ferarris. SO…we know that when a goal is set, it can be met. Look at what this country is capable of, what it has accomplished in the past, and now we’re being held hostage by a bunch of clowns in the middle east who dictate what direction our economy goes by manipulating the cost of a barrel of crude. I just wonder what it’s going to take…sigh.

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